I’ll be the guest of the charming Kooch Daniels on Kosmic Koffee with Kooch on March 27, 2013 at 1:00 pm! You can go listen via the NuLife Radio page on Blog Talk Radio, or dial in at +1.347.637.3372. We’ll talk about Tarot (of course!), answer questions, and who knows what else!

Talk to you Wednesday!

You are cordially invited to our very first WooFest! on Thursday, March 28, 2013, from 5:00 – 8:00 pm at Mission Alchemy Event Space.

This is a casual, fun event, to celebrate Tarot, oracles, divination, and the great people in our community with whom we share these interests! There’s no cover charge – we want everyone to feel welcome!

Readings will be available from the fabulous Thalassa and Artemis J.

Tarot Media Company will be there, tempting you with all kinds of books, decks, oracles, DVDs, and other divinatory goodies.

We’ll have some treats to share, and space for you to hang out and play with your new toys and spend time with old friends – and make new ones!

Mission Alchemy is at 2601 Mission Street, corner of 22nd Street, in the USBank building. It’s two blocks from 24th Street Mission BART in San Francisco, one block from the Bartlett Garage (there’s also street parking!), and across the street from a couple of Muni lines. Really, it just couldn’t be easier to get here!

See you Thursday!

“Whenever anything negative happens to you, there is a deep lesson concealed within it, although you may not see it at the time.” ~ Eckhart Tolle

With all due respect, Mr. Tolle – bullshit.

Sometimes, negative things happen, and there is no lesson. Things happen beyond our control, out of the blue, beyond our wildest imagination – and it’s just the universal forces in motion. There is no lesson, no higher message – things happen, and sometimes what happens really sucks.

One of my HR colleagues had a sign in her office that read, “What’s great about this?” Whenever an employee came to her with a problem, she’d point to the sign and require them to give an answer before she’d continue the discussion.  If she’d done that to me (I was not an employee there, thank the gods), my response would have been, “What’s great about this is that I realize what an utterly useless way of managing internal issues this is, and I quit so I can work somewhere that isn’t run by idiots.”

Sometimes, there is a lesson.  You drink too much alcohol one night, make an idiot of yourself, get sick, anger your friends, and lose two days to a miserable hangover. The lesson is pretty clear – don’t drink to excess.

Sometimes, there is no lesson.  My mother died in an accident during my last week of classes in my final semester of college.  I took four “Incompletes”, and it took me three months to finish my course week and my honors thesis, in between settling her estate, dealing with the lawsuit against the other driver who caused the accident, and moving myself to California.  What was the lesson there? Be sure to ask your parents to schedule their untimely deaths around your academic obligations and moving schedule?

Apophenia (as defined on Wikipedia: “the experience of seeing meaningful patterns or connections in random or meaningless data”) can a real problem. How do we know when something is a real pattern, or when we are imposing meaning that isn’t there? (I encourage you to read the entire article – the origin of the term “apophany” in psychiatric research dealing with schizophrenia will keep you up for a night or two.)

The counterpoint experience is “epiphany”, which our friends at Dictionary.com define as “a sudden, intuitive perception of or insight into the reality or essential meaning of something” – seeing based on patterns that are actually present. Yes, we all see things differently, and what is “real” for one person might not be “real” for another. But at the point we wish so hard for something to be “real” – despite our own knowledge that it is not – we have crossed from epiphany to apophany.

As Tarot readers, we look for patterns in the cards. How many Major Arcana cards are in the spread? Court cards? How many of each minor suit? Are there repeating numbers? Repeating symbols?

Someone who has a large number of Major Arcana cards in the spread is probably in or heading for one or more life transitions. Someone with lots of Pentacle cards may be dealing with work or housing issues. Someone with lots of Cups cards probably has relationship work to do, in one form or another. The pattern can help the client focus on the issues and devise creative approaches to managing them.

But sometimes, there is no pattern. The cards are randomly and evenly distributed among the suits. There are no number patterns. There are no repeating symbols. There’s no big epiphany, no flashing neon message – just disparate pieces of information for the client to apply to their life as they are able.

When bad things happen (we lose a job, a valued possession breaks, or someone close to us dies), we feel an emotional void, and we want to ascribe meaning to the event as a way to manage our emotions.  This is a classic left brain coping mechanism – “if I can understand it, I can manage it”.

Sometimes, there is no meaning – our employer decides to cut costs, and we’re laid off; the tectonic plates shift, and a treasured piece of porcelain falls to the floor and smashes; we’re all human, and we will all shuffle off this mortal coil at some point.

Sometimes, it’s just random, and stuff just happens. Sometimes, there is no meaning, no understanding – sometimes, there is only acceptance.

I’ve never seen the movie “Groundhog Day“, but I know the plot summary, which is that, through repetition of a single day in his life, Bill Murray’s character learns to be a better person and to take actions to make the world a better place.

We all have patterns of behavior, speech, feeling, or thinking that are helpful to us – we read Tarot for insight, we meditate for calm, we brush our teeth so we have fresh breath and nice smiles. We also have negative patterns which keep us stuck in unhealthy situations and create distress. Some of these unhealthy patterns may have developed as coping mechanisms which served us temporarily, but now the situation has changed and we have moved on, and the pattern, instead of supporting us, now limits our growth.

At tonight’s San Francisco Tarot Cafe, we did two spreads to help us examine negative patterns, and how to break free of them and create a new, positive pattern to replace the unhealthy behavior.

You can do this with one deck, but it works better with two decks. Use one deck for the first spread, and a different deck for the second spread.

The first spread gives an overview of the negative pattern. Think about the pattern you’re stuck in, shuffle the cards, and lay them out so:

3

1

2

Card 1 represents the pattern itself. What are you stuck in? What is going on?

Card 2 represents what is keeping you stuck in the pattern. Why do you keep repeating this pattern? What purpose did it used to serve that is now a limitation?

Card 3 represent how to break out of the pattern. What energy do you need to help you move forward? What needs to change?

The second spread gives detailed information about breaking free.  Keep card 3 from the first spread out, and lay it to your left. Shuffle your second deck, and draw five cards from it. The cards from the first spread are to the left of cards in the new spread:

From first spread

New cards for second spread

5

4

3

3

1

2

2

1

First, take a look at the cards in the second spread – are any of them the same as any of the cards in the first spread? If so, examine the link between the card’s positions in each spread. Where did the same card repeat? Is it reversed or upright from the first spread? Are the images similar or different?

The cards themselves offer the following insight:

Card 1 represents the changes you need to make in the physical / material world to break free of the old pattern and create a new one. This might be as simple as cleaning your house to remove clutter and dust, or as involved as revamping your eating habits.

Card 2 represents the emotional changes you need to make. What emotions or emotional responses to the situation no longer serve you? Where do you need to grow, what do you need to let go of? It might be an emotional pattern based on a relationship you left long ago, and you no longer need to protect yourself from that person.

Card 3 represents the creative changes needed to move into a new way of being. We’re all creative in our daily lives, even if we don’t engage in what are usually thought of as “creative” activities. How can you bring your creative spirit into your life more so that you can live more fully?

Card 4 represents the intellectual changes needed to move forward. Our thoughts often keep us stuck longer than our emotions do – our heart knows we need to move on, but our mind persists in giving us limiting thoughts which keep us stuck. Alternately, we spend so much time thinking about different possibilities that we develop analysis paralysis and don’t actually *do* anything to create change.

Card 5 represents changes need on the level of soul or spirit. These are often the changes we are first aware of that we need to make, especially if we have some kind of soulful or spiritual practice which allows us to focus on our higher selves. At the same time that we are aware of these needed changes, these can be the hardest changes to make, as they require us to accept a new image of ourselves as strong, capable, and powerful, and sometimes require what feel like drastic steps to create change.  Sometimes, yes, a dramatic change is called for; often, however, the most dramatic changes are on the inner level, not the outer world, and are invisible and unknown to anyone but ourselves.

I used David Palladini‘s Aquarian Tarot for Spread 1, and the fabulous Wildwood Tarot by Mark Ryan, John Matthews, and Will Worthington for Spread 2.  The final card in Spread 2 was the beautiful and haunting card 10, The Wheel.

Their summary of the card tells us exactly what we need to know about living in awareness of our patterns:

“. . . on the human level we are the weavers of our own destiny.   Consciously or unconsciously, we make the patterns and possibilities that mark our path through fate. We wear our fate around us like a cloak, carrying with us all the potential and possibilities that the universe has to offer and, although the seemingly random, chaotic nature of the universe always has the final word, we can affect our own life and that of the world by taking control of our own destiny.  Many believe that fate is set, that all things are predestined no matter what we do in this human reality, but the weaver of the cloak can affect this ever-shifting matrix of potential just by recognizing the pattern and making timely decisions.  We can grasp the web of fate and weave in our own special, personal pattern.”

From The Wildwood Tarot companion book, pp. 56 – 57

I hope these spreads are helpful to you as you weave the tapestry of your life.

One of the things we discussed in last week’s Tarot Journey was the difficulty of making real behavioral change. We all do things we know aren’t healthy for us – we eat too much sugar, spend too much time in front of a screen of some kind, spend money on things we don’t need or want, procrastinate, or some other behavior that works against our best interests.

Psychological experts have varying theories on motivation, rewards, avoidance, and other factors influencing behavior. What they don’t have is one surefire, 100% effective way to deal with modifying behavior to create new patterns.  So, I created this spread! (Okay, disclaimer: no guarantees that this is a surefire, 100% efective way to deal with modifying behavior, but I hope that you find it helpful in creating the behavioral changes you desire).

The spread contains four cards:

1.  Goal. This is the first card, because you have to know what you want to accomplish, or the rest of the spread doesn’t make any sense.

2.  How to create conditions to produce desired behavior. This card is in the base position, as it’s the foundation necessary for the desired result.

3.  How to remove / reduce attractiveness of undesirable behavior. This card is by itself, off to the left, to indicate what you need to move away from, what is to be left behind.

4.  How to provide reinforcement for desired behavior. This is the key between the foundation (Card 2) and the goal (card 1), so it visually links those two cards.

For each card, identify the issues, set an intention, and create an action to carry out the message of the card. Knowledge and intention are good, but if they’re not expressed through action, you are not going to change your behavior.

I used the Wildwood Tarot by Mark Ryan, John Matthews, and Will Worthington. (I don’t have scans of these images, so my suggestion is to acquire this amazing deck if you don’t already have it, so you can follow along.)  The behavior I want to address is the habit of working on my business all the time, to the exclusion of seeing my friends, having fun, relaxing, or taking time to be creative.

1. Goal: The Wanderer. This card corresponds to the RWS Fool. This fits nicely with my desire to be able to step away from my desk and take time to explore the world around me and spend time simply experiencing life. My action here is to create a list of enjoyable things I would like to make time for, and then actually schedule the time to do them.

2. Foundation: Six of Bows / Abundance. Wow. Whack upside the head time.  I need to step back and look at the truth of why I push myself the way I do. Where am I feeling a lack? Am I really worried about a lack on the material level, or am I attempting to fill some other deficiency that is more difficult to name, or that I am unwilling to confront? My action here is to answer these questions honestly, adjust my thinking and feeling to acknowledge the abundance that does exist, and address the real reasons I am experiencing feelings of lack.

3. What to Remove. Queen of Stones / Bear.  Aaaaand, another whack upside the head. The mother bear is about protecting, nurturing, caring.  The book reinforces this idea: “Many depend on you.” Well, yes – I have authors, clients, employees, friends, family. What the card says to me is to also use that mother bear energy to protect, nurture, and care for myself as vigorously as I do for others.

My action here is to set healthy boundaries around my time and energy, and say “no” to what does not truly serve me.  Below is a quote that sums it up perfectly:

“Whenever we deny our need to say ‘no’, our self-respect diminishes. It is not only our right at certain times to say ‘no’; it is our deepest responsibility. For it is a gift to ourselves when we say ‘no’ to those old habits that dissipate our energy, ‘no’ to what robs us of our inner joy, ‘no’ to what distracts us from our purpose. And it is a gift to others to say ‘no’ when their expectations do not ring true for us, for in so doing we free them to discover more fully the truth of their own path. Saying ‘no’ can be liberating when it expresses our commitment to take a stand for what we believe we truly need.”

~Ann Mortifee and John Robbins

4. Reinforcement. The Blasted Oak, card 16, a combination of the RWS Hanged Man and Tower cards. Whee!

Notice that the card position is about providing reinforcement for the behavior – it doesn’t specify whether that’s positive reinforcement (starting from a neutral place and ending in a positive place, such as with praise or a treat) or negative reinforcement (starting in a negative place and ending in a neutral place, for example, wearing shoes that hurt your feet, removing the shoes, and experiencing the relief from the pain).

“Positive” and “negative” don’t refer to the result, but to the starting point. This card is about the reinforcement, not the reward. The reward is the achievement of the Goal in Card #1. Too much casual pop psychology has created a muddle around these terms, so it’s important to be very clear how they’re being used in this spread. (For a concise discussion, see this blog post on “Best in Flock“.)

In this particular reading, The Blasted Oak is a negative reinforcement – that is, the lightning striking the tree breaks the restrictions I feel caught in. In so doing, this creates the freedom that is the Goal in card #1, which is a positive reward.

*****

A rough reading – lots of internal work is required here, and that’s something I have not been giving myself time to do. However, if I give myself permission to step away from my desk and honestly work through the points raised in the reading, I can restore some sanity to my schedule and achieve a more satisfying work/life balance.

If you do this reading and want to share your results, please post in the comments. If you don’t want to share publicly, you can drop me an email and let me know how it worked for you.

Adepto vestri anates in ordine! (Translation: Get your ducks in a row!)

This Saturday, January 12, start your new year with a Tarot Journey!

A new calendar year! New possiblities! New adventures! New “oh my god what am I going to do this year?” choices to make.

We’ll use various spreads to define where we are, generate ideas about where we want to go, and create a wheel of the year to help us get there.

Bring your cards, notebook and pen, and your curiosity!

The workshop features discussions, practical exercises, and direct, personal exploration of the cards.

Additionally, Tarot Media Company donates a prize each month – a deck, a book, or some other wonderful item from our shop!

Each class runs from 1:00 — 4:30 pm, held at the Mission Alchemy Event Space., 2601 Mission Street, San Francisco.

Due to space considerations, we request that you preregister for the class on the Tarot Media Company website.

See you Saturday!

The end of the calendar year is a completely artificial construct – I mean, Time isn’t aware that we humans have segmented it in various ways in a semi-pathetic attempt to control it – but we all buy into it because, well, try ignoring the calendar and see how well that works.

Also, if you run a business or have a job or have kids (or really, are just on the planet and breathing), there are certain externally imposed tasks that must be completed by this artificial, and yet inevitable, deadline, or else Bad Things Will Happen. And there’s probably a holiday or two (or more) that you want to observe between now and December 31. (Although “want” isn’t always the right word with holidays, but that’s another post.)

There are 22 calendar days left in the year. Remove one or two days for Frantic Holiday Preparations for Holiday of Your Choice, remove said Holiday, remove December 31 because it’s a short work day for a lot of people (other than Retail and Hospitality employees), and you have 18 days to do it all. The mere thought is enough to make a T Rex molt.

So, let’s take a deep breath, exhale, and look at the List of Things That Must Be Done Or Else.

First, how many of those really and truly *must* happen? If any of them don’t happen by 5:00 pm on December 31, how dire are the consequences?  If the consequence is that your electricity will be turned off, or the government will give you a hefty fine for not doing something, that’s a Must Do. If the consequence is that  you’ll just have to do it on January 2 and no one will mind, it can wait until January 2.

Now that you’ve marked up your list, it is (hopefully) smaller and more manageable.

Certain things can be done only at certain times or places. You can only grocery shop when the store is open, although the number of places where one can purchase groceries has expanded greatly. (Still, you probably can’t pick up everything for your Christmas Brunch or Kwanzaa supper at Office Max.) Sort out those items, and you’re left with the list of Oh My God When Is This Going to Get Done? (OMGWITGTGD, or “I Need A Drink NOW”.)

So, take that list, and pick the three biggest things. If you have a list that has fewer than three things, congratulations!

This is a simple two card spread, one spread for each item on your list.

Card 1: What is keeping you from accomplishing this item? This may be an internal or external block – for example, fear, lack of motivation, lack of information, lack of cooperation from others.

Card 2: What you can do to deal with this block.

We did this spread at San Francisco Tarot Cafe last week, so I’ll share the reading I received there. We added a bit of a twist – Card 1 was drawn by the client from their own deck, and Card 2 was drawn by the reader from their own deck, just to make it a bit more interesting.

I drew Card 1 from David Palladini‘s Aquarian Tarot, and received the Queen of Swords. What is keeping me from accomplishing this task is being too caught up in my head, thinking about everything I have to do and giving in to the sense of impending doom attached to it all. Also, being distracted by things that aren’t worth my attention is a problem. I need to trim my list and refocus my thinking.

For Card 2, my reading partner drew from the Pagan Cats Tarot. Two cards stuck together – the Three of Cups (showing three cats in the usual RWS scheme of holding cups and doing a circle dance) and the Four of Cups (showing a cat sleeping next to four cups). Her suggestion was to go dancing, get drunk, and take a long nap.

While that precise course of action isn’t feasible, I took the suggestion to mean I could lighten up and enjoy the holidays (we celebrate pretty much every December holiday we can find). Do the best I can to fulfill my responsibilities, work when I’m at work, and let it go when it’s time to be with family and friends.

I’m trying to put this into practice – for example, I took *all* of Saturday off – slept in, played online, read in front of the fire all evening. Today I’ve done some work, but nothing too strenuous. Tomorrow, I will be back at my desk and greet my to do list with calm determination (instead of feelings of oppression and doom), and see how it goes.

I’d love to hear how your readings go with this spread! Feel free to add a Comment!

The October workshop will continue the exploration of Tarot and Kabbalah. The sepiroth (the “sapphires”) on the Tree of Life represent complex ideas and are their own worlds in the Tree. We’ll put on our figurative space suits and journey through the worlds to see how they relate to our work with Tarot.

Bring your cards, notebook and pen, and your curiosity!

BONUS! This workshop is on Fleet Weekend, and we’ll have an unobstructed view of the Blue Angels air show!

The workshop features discussions, practical exercises, and direct, personal exploration of the cards.

Additionally, Tarot Media Company donates a prize each month – a deck, a book, or some other wonderful item from our shop!

Each class runs from 1:00 — 4:30 pm, held at the Mission Alchemy Event Space at 2601 Mission Street in San Francisco, California.

Due to space considerations, we request that you preregister for the class on the Tarot Media Company website.

See you Saturday!

The suit of cups corresponds to the element of water. The Chariot card is associated with the Zodiac sign Cancer. Interesting, and yet. What do you do with that?

Welcome to Getting Real with Tarot. This ongoing workshop series focuses on practical application of Tarot to real situations – goal setting, project management, problem solving – that we face in our daily lives.

We’ll combine the cards with techniques for creative brainstorming, time management, project development, and personal coaching to focus on what’s important – whether it’s finishing your novel or organizing your closet – and help you define, refine, and achieve what matters to you.

The workshop runs 6:00 pm – 8:00 pm at the Mission Alchemy Event Space in San Francisco. Mission Alchemy is located at 22nd and Mission Streets, just two blocks from BART!

For more details and to register, please visit Tarot Media Company.

Today – Sunday! at 11:00 am Pacific time, join me, Kooch Daniels, and Dax Carlisle on NuLife Radio!  We’ll be chatting about Tarot, books, and who knows what else. You can join the fun by phone, online, or Skype!

You can join the show here!